Category Archives: Red Dwarf Quotes

GENITALIA SMALL AND INOFFENSIVE. OF NO VALUE OR INTEREST

LIster to Red Dwarf. We have in our midst a complete smeg pot. Brains in the anal region. Chin absent, presumed missing. Genitalia small and inoffensive. Of no value or interest.

GENITALIA SMALL AND INOFFENSIVE. OF NO VALUE OR INTEREST

LIster to Red Dwarf. We have in our midst a complete smeg pot. Brains in the anal region. Chin absent, presumed missing. Genitalia small and inoffensive. Of no value or interest.

Red Dwarf Season 3 Opening Scrolling text

Do you remember the opening scrolling text from Red Dwarf Series 3? Here’s the text from the red Dwarf scrolling text in full.

Red Dwarf scrolling text

Red Dwarf Scrolling Text

Red Dwarf III
The Saga Continuums

Three million years in the future, Dave Lister, the last human being alive, discovers he is pregnant after a liason with his female self in a parallel universe. His pregnancy concludes with the successful delivery of twin boys, Jim and Bexley. However, because the twins were conceived in another universe, with different physical laws, they suffer from highly accelerated growth rates, and are both 18 years old within 3 days of being born. In order to save their lives, Lister returns them to the universe of their origin, where they are reunited with their father (a woman), and are able to lead comparatively normal lives. Well, as normal as you can be if you’ve been born in a parallel universe and your father’s a woman, and your mother’s a man, and you’re eighteen years old three days after your birth. Shortly afterwards, Kryten, the service mechanoid who had left the ship after being rescued from his own crashed vessel, the Nova 5, is found in pieces after his space bike crash lands onto an asteroid. Lister rebuilds the ‘noid, but is unable to recapture his former personality. Meanwhile, Holly, the increasingly erratic Red Dwarf computer, performs a head-sex change operation on himself. He bases his new face on Hilly, a female computer with whom he’d once fallen madly in love.

And now the saga continuums…

Red Dwarf III
The Same Generation
–nearly–

You can check out the full script for Red Dwarf Backwards here.

Just let me check: Thermos, sandwiches, corn plasters….

Just let me check: thermos, sandwiches, corn plasters, telephone money, dandruff brush, animal footprint chart, and one triple thick condom…you never know!

JUST LET ME CHECK: THERMOS…AND ONE TRIPLE THICK CONDOM…YOU NEVER KNOW

Preparation to travel Red Dwarf style!

Yes !

Just let me check: thermos, sandwiches, corn plasters, telephone money, dandruff brush, animal footprint chart, and one triple thick condom...you never know!